People Are Horrible

And I'm back. Here's some comic strips that are stupid.

Girls & Sports 12/28/09

I guess that the message here is that single guys are picky assholes? The $100 one sounds fine to me. It gets you unlimited champagne and $100 is not that much if you get free alcohol. If you paid $50 but had to pay for your liquor you'd likely end up paying way more than $100 by the end of the night.

Luann 12/28/09

Small children are horrible people.

A small child that is single is possibly the worst type of person that there is.

Oh, wait. Children are always single. Nevermind

Off the Mark 12/28/09

This is the first comic about Twitter that hasn't completely sucked. It still sucks, just not completely.

Nintendo Has Good Marketing

I bet you thought I would forget about my promise to post more, but I didn't so I guess I showed you.


Moderately Confused 10/5/09
No, he can't. In order for a speech to be Obama-esque, you need to be an extremely popular person with good public speaking skills. A speech cannot produce either of those things.



Girls & Sports 10/5/09
Women are shallow.



Pickles 10/5/09
Why do the old people have a Wii? I don't think I've ever seen them use it. Do they have just for when the grandkids come over? That would mean that Nintendo has succeeded in its marketing goals.



Strange Brew 10/5/09
I don't get it. Something about his gigantic eye?

High Fashion

So comics.com is finally working again. I don't know what that was about but here's some comics to get you through the day. There's some more at DCR which has a link on the sidebar to the right.

Arlo & Janis 8/9/09Funny? No, but it wasn't meant to be.

Heartwarming? Not really because nobody reads Arlo & Janis for the marriage advice.



Girls & Sports 8/9/09
Well, how many clothes are we talking about here? Because sometimes it can take a lot of effort to get your jeans off. Like when you spent 2 hours stuffing your fat self into them.

Not that I would know anything about that. . .

Also, what you do after you take your clothes off can burn quite a few calories. If you do it right.



Graffiti 9/8/09
No, no they don't. They look like women who were born with an aesthetically pleasing skin, muscle tone, and bone structure.

If model really were scaffolding for real women that would mean that there's a fashion model inside every women. And that would be kind of creepy. Because it's not a metaphorical model, it's a literal model inside someone else.

Super Post to the Rescue!

Sorry about the other day, I was being lazy and then I had to do the DCR post because Bryce was out of commission. Here's a bunch for you today. I even ventured to the depths of Gocomics.com for you today.

Remember to take breaks when using your computer for extended time periods.


Bound and Gagged 4/7/09
This is either a poop joke or a subtle jab at the state of London's premier newspaper.

I bet it's a poop joke.



Reynolds Unwrapped 4/7/09

Much funnier caption:"The lip transplant didn't take so they put an organ in her mouth."

That's right, I went there.

Joe Vanilla 4/7/09

Silly crudely drawn man, don't you know that no one actually reads blogs?

Secret Asian Man 4/7/09

I went to see Watchmen (not as good as advertised, but what is these days?) and for some reason, another theater patron decided that it would be a good idea to bring their small child. I mean really small, only slightly bigger than an infant. What is wrong with people? First off, the material is too smart for most adults to understand so a child that can't speak doesn't need to speak. Second off, there was some extreme violence and nudity which no child needs to see. Third off, the movie wasn't that good, I could have told you it wasn't going to be that good in January. If you couldn't find someone to babysit, it wouldn't have been a loss to stay at home.

The child didn't make any noise at least.

The Knight Life 4/7/09

It looks more like a cat than a cat-woman. And I don't think that the Hulk cares about the environment since he his a mindless killing machine (the good Hulk is anyway).

It's All About You 4/7/09

Women only exist to make men feel guilty. Nice display of originality. NOT!

Did you see what I did there? Using an old, unoriginal joke to mock a comic that's using an old, unoriginal joke is great fun. You should try it.

Girls & Sports 4/7/09

Damn that equality. Why couldn't the men of the '60's and '70's have stood up to those bitches?
Probably because they were burning their bras, which makes it impossible to say no to a woman.

BC 4/7/09

Women's only joy in life is to tell others what to do. Even cavemen were subjected to the tyranny of the cavewomen.

Was it Woman Bashing Day or something? I found 3 comics and I only looked at slightly more than what you see here.

F Minus 4/7/09

Do they have cookies in the Girl Scout Reserves? If so, then sign me up!

Oh damn, I forgot I'm not a 12-year-old girl. Anymore.

Just kidding. I'll always be a 12-year-old girl in my heart.

Little Dog Lost 4/7/09

Yes, trust the lemming. He is your friend and would never lead you to danger. The lemming will always protect you.

Until you run off a cliff because you were dumb enough to trust the lemming.

Fresh Meat

We have some new(er) comics to add to the list of unreadable, unfunny garbage. Today's first two comics are new to comics.com and, as usual, terrible. At least they are so far, we'll see if they get any better.


Little Dog Lost 4/2/09Yeah, don't yell anything at me from your coffin after you die and are unable to speak because you are no longer alive.

I hate when people say stupid things like that.



It's All About You 4/2/09
What if I sold my soul to the Devil? Then you'd be messing with his property and I don't think that's something you want.

Also, please don't punch me in the face. I don't care what you do to my soul, but leave my face alone.



Girls & Sports 4/2/09
Why is technology involved in . . . that word? Damn, I'm so manly that I can't even type it. I must have dropped an extra testicle recently.

Side Note: If I had dropped an extra testicle, I would have 5. That's right, I was born with 4 testicles.

Side Note to Side Note: I do not have extra testicles. I have the normal amount for a regular human.

Side Note to Side Note of Side Note: This has been an exercise to see how many times I could type testicle in reference to one comic. I think I did pretty good.



Family Tree 4/2/09
Sales people are stupid. People that believe sales people are really stupid. I'm not saying they're stupid all the time, they just made a stupid decision based on someone exploiting their emotions.



B.C. 4/2/09
His 'dignity' must be huge because that's one long throat.



Arlo & Janis 4/2/09
I don't understand what being a man has to do with shitting in the garden. Are a lot of guys shitting in their girlfriend's/wife's garden? If they are they should likely be arrested because that is indecent exposure, among other things.



Committed 4/2/09
Ha . . . ha . . . ha. What a clever joke about the fact that babies can't communicate. How mind-numbingly original. Wait, what's that thing that's the opposite of original? Because the definition of that word is this comic.

Funny Post Title Goes Here

Super-duper post today to make up for the lack of one yesterday.

And unless I get some votes other than doing every comic every day, I may have to change the poll. Come on guys, there is no way to do that many comics in one day.

But I digress, here is what we have today:


Rudy Park 3/20/09
I think that AIG has cost the government, which means the American people, way more than Lehman Brothers ever could have. We've given mulitple multi-billion dollar loans to AIG and the government now owns about 80% of the company. Lehman Brothers may have screwed quite a few people, but not as many as AIG.

Did you know that AIG stands for American International Group? What the hell does that even mean? And they are, probably, going to change the name once they get back to being a profitable company because of all the negative things that AIG conjures in the imagination. Do people really fall for that? Do people think that Phillip Morris is a good company since they changed their name to Altria? Feel free to leave thoughts in the comments.



Girls & Sports 3/20/09
That's what I call a win-win scenario. She gets to go to a fancy restuarant and he gets to watch basketball for 90 minutes.

I'm not sure why anyone would want to watch basketball for 90 minutes, but I guess that's a personal choice.



Betty 3/20/09
Why is that troubling? That guy is contributing to society way more than any of us are. He is getting people interested in physiology and biology. All we do is sit in our chairs and write mean things about comic strips. I'm not saying being mean to comic strips isn't fun, it just doesn't contribute to society in a meaningful way.



The Barn 3/20/09
Actually, the Earth will be in alignment with the center of the galaxy, or something like that. Somehow the Mayans knew that it would happen on that date 3000 years ago, or whenever they made the calender.

And is clover an important resource or something? Or is it just that the disappearance of clover would be devasating to a sheep?



Herb & Jamaal 3/20/09
Yes, Herb & Jamaal, no one really reads the nutritional facts. My question is this: why is he eating chips? Has he run out of money and can't afford anything else anymore? That's my hope.



Cow & Boy 3/20/09
Without all the Irish stuff a leprechaun is just a midget.

Or dwarf, whatever your preference is.


Natural Selection 3/20/09
"Dehydrated Water, it's got that concentrated water flavor!"

But seriously, people said that bottled water would never catch on and look how popular it is. Bottled water is so popular that it has single-handedly advanced the destruction of the planet by at least 3000 years. Come on people, just get the water from your sink, it's the same mother-fucking stuff.

And We're Back

Sorry about the layoff, I was too lazy over the last week to do anything. But, we are back in business now. And away we go.

Working It Out 3/16/09

Why are they in a RAB? What the hell is a RAB?

Oh, wait. Is it supposed to be BAR? That would make more sense.

What kind of crazy BAR has no tables?

Heathcliff 3/16/09Why is Heathcliff sitting on the Old Man's dick? That's a whole new level of sickness.

Girls & Sports 3/16/09

If you need Viagra and you're under the age of 60, then you don't really need Viagra.

And it's not performance-enhancing if you have a legitimate medical condition.

The Dinette Set 3/16/09

What are JARTS? I have no idea what's going on in the rest of the panel, but in the lower right corner, there is a drawer labeled "JARTS". Does anyone know what that could possibly be?

Brevity 3/16/09

What are they voting for? That could have tremendous influence over whose vote is needed. And not all insects would have the same views, seeing as how some of them are carnivorous and some are herbivorous. I highly doubt that Bulldog Ants have the same political affiliation as Butterflies.

A Post, A Post, My Kingdom for a Post

Wow, I've been lazy the last few days. Oh well. Here's a bunch of comics for you to not enjoy, with some commentary from me. You can enjoy that last bit, if you didn't then why did you come here?


Dinosaur Comics 3/10/09Forsooth, guys, don't you have something better to do? I mean, I don't, but you already knew that. You could go read Dinosaur Comics, it's great, plus there's a link over on the sidebar. Go ahead, click on it. But finish reading first.



Rudy Park 3/10/09
Who still likes Jessica Simpson? Yeah, she has big jugs, but she's so stupid and annoying that it makes it hard to care about the ginormous breasts.

Also, she can't sing very well and her songs suck.



Herb & Jamaal 3/10/09
Wow, insulting daytime talk shows. How original, Herb & Jamaal. What, you couldn't think of any "old people are old" jokes?



Girls & Sports 3/10/09
Isn't that kind of how it works anyway? Maybe you don't sign a contract, but the thought is there. And baseball isn't the sport I would use for this analogy. I'd go with football. NFL teams can dump any player at any time, but for the highest paid players they pay a price. That fits more with what relationships are like than baseball does.



Ferd'nand 3/10/09
What the hell kind of job is that? It must be something only rich people can afford.

It does raise a good question about how fat people get on a horse. I'm assuming they have a step or something.

It's the Naked Tooth-Fairy-Monster!!

Reality Check 1/27/09

Sadly, this is, most likely, not far from the truth. I remeber reading an aritcle about people using their office computers to surf porn sites, while they were supposed to be working! It was a really high number of people that were doing it too. Although I don't think that many people are stripping down or masturbating, but it wouldn't really surprise me.



Girls & Sports 1/27/09
"Yeah, 60 years, maybe less if you have a loaded gun or a sharp knife."

If marriage was so terrible, no one would ever do it. It really is that simple.


Frazz 1/27/09

What kind of school is this? I've never seen pickle loaf on a school cafeteria menu or french dip, but I went to a shit school so I don't know the whole story. Pickle loaf and french dip should never be confused, ever.

F-Minus 1/27/09

Does anyone actually put up a tooth-fairy alarm? If that's the tooth-fairy, then I'm glad that I didn't ever wake up for that.

On a scientific note, I don't think those wings could lift that horrible monster. Also, his eyes are different sizes.

God wants you to read

Girls & Sports 1/3/09Is that really something to brag about? I know that I don't brag abou....I mean I don't know anyone that brags about that. Yeah, that's what I mean.....

Red & Rover 1/3/09I don't get this comic. So the dog attracted all the snow in the sky? That makes no sense and it's not funny.

Secret Asian Man 1/3/09 I don't know why God would care whether or not your kid ate candy or not. Just doesn't seem like something the supposed creator of the universe would give a shit about.